Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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