I think I just saw someone hide a body.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
