i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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