i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
