I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Randomize
