White coat. Heels.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
