you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Randomize
