i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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