In America we eat man semen.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
