just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
