You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Dick very happy bro
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
