Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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