Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize