Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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