id be glad to
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
