fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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