birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
