Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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