i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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