Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
P.S. I can't hear my feet
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
My dick has a subreddit
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize