she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
