your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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