My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
