quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
you have to choose: penises or morals?
it's like iHOP with fire
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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