love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Randomize
