I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
