Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
