You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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