I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
