Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
