She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
