No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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