If you die in college, do you die in real life?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
