Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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