And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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