she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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