She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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