I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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