i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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