Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize