nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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