Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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