He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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