I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
