can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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