i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
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