You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
4 words: hood of his car
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
