Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I have aggressive nipples.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
