So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize