Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
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