I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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