I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
